Dear Dad,

I recently read that there are over 24 million youth in America that grow up without a father and I wanted to take a chance to tell you "Thank You" for stepping up and being the man that God called you to be.  I could have written a letter, but who does that anymore?  Plus, seeing how bad I am about taking letters to the post office, I probably would've made it to Maryland before the letter!

You have truly inspired me and influenced me to be who I am. Growing up as Daddy's Little Girl, I always knew you were my man to run to if I had questions or problems.  You modeled the open arms that God our Father has towards us, which in turn made it easier for me to turn to Him when I have questions that can't be answered by anyone here on Earth.

You have always shown the women in your life love and respect and in turn, I knew how a man was supposed to treat a woman.  And I expected nothing less from the men I dated and from the man I married.

You always let me know that you expected the best out of me and because of that, I in turn expect the best out of myself.  And even when things didn't turn out for the best, you always kept smiling.... helping us all to keep going.

And on top of all of that, you were have never been afraid to be goofy and have fun.  And because of that, I too can just relax, be silly and enjoy life.

You may not have a lot to show for in this life, but believe me, the things you have showed me in life are more than any car, house or bank account in this world.  I love you!

Happy Birthday! 

Still your Little Girl,
Kacey

Focusing on the positive

Throughout my life, people have occasionally asked me "How do you stay so positive?"   Well, I'm going to let you in on the secret.....are you ready?

I haven't figured out how to have a perfect life.  I don't think I ever will.  I have bad things happen to me every day and  I've had some really "messy" things happen to me or around me. Once you come to terms with the fact that life will never be perfect and things will not always go as you plan, the secret is to focus on the positive.

Here's an example.
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20100313/ap_on_re_us/us_obama_education

There are plenty of issues from the administration that I could choose to go bananas over.  But instead, I would like to commend our President for taking the issue of education seriously and vowing to make changes to the No Child Left Behind Act.  While I know our former President had great intentions on putting this Act into place, it isn't working.  Living and working in a county where 80% of our schools haven't met adequate yearly progress, I've noticed that educators are spending far too much time worrying about how well the kids are going to test and not enough time worrying if the kids are actually learning.  So, props to you Mr. Obama.

Another example?
Someone gave me a statistic the other day that by the age of 17, 50% of American teenagers have had sexual relations.  My response?  Well, that's great!  No, I don't believe it is great that by 17, half of our teenagers have given away a part of them that they can't get back.  BUT, look at the other side of the glass.  It shows that 50% of teenagers HAVEN'T had sex by the age of 17.   So now teenagers are going to have to have a better excuse than everybody is doing it.  Because they aren't!!!!!!!!

If I chose to focus on all the negative in my life and in this world, I would be miserable.  In every bad situation, there is always something good.  You just have to figure out where your focus is going to be.

When you get a donut, do you focus on the hole in the donut or the donut itself?  Most people focus on the warm doughy goodness.  If you focused on the big hole in the center, you probably wouldn't enjoy the donut.  Instead of focusing on the "holes" we should focus on the "whole" picture -- life isn't ALL bad! 
 

Can I have an adult menu please?

Do you remember being too old for the kids menu and proudly asking for an adult menu?  My little sister is so ready for the day that she doesn't have to even consider the children's menu anymore.  Me?  I'd much rather order off the kids menu at a restaurant... the portion sizes are a little more appropriate.  ANYWAY...

If you are old enough to order off the adult menu... what else are you old enough for?  Should you be ready for everything on the adult menu of life?  Work?  Responsibilities?  Oh the pain these words cause teenagers. But only because they've been trained to think that these things are against them.

When child labor laws were put into effect is when "teenagers" were really "invented".  Before, you were either a child or an adult.   Don't believe me?  Go get your concordance and look up the word teenager or teen in the Bible.... I'll wait.





::crickets chirping::

Couldn't find it?  Neither could I... but look what I did find.

1 Corinthians 13:11 - When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me.


Hmm. Interesting. There was no middle stage mentioned.  Either child or adult.  No option to be in the middle.  So teens, I ask you... which do you consider yourself to be?  And adults, how do you treat teenagers?  If we are treating them like children, they will act like children.  If however, we raise the bar and expect them to act like adults... maybe just maybe they'll surprise you!

Next up.. it's about to get good....

1 Corinthians 4:11 - Brothers, stop thinking like children.  In regard to evil, be infants, but in your thinking be adults

Again, no in between stage here.  This verse is right on... but unfortunately our culture screams the exact opposite to our children....doesn't it? Be MATURE in your EVIL but be IMMATURE and infant like in your THINKING. Ugh. 

So, before I get way up on this soapbox.... let me end with a challenge.  Teenagers... think of something that you would love to do and would be completely out of the ordinary for someone your age.... and set out to do it.  These are the best years of your life.  You aren't tied down with bills.  You don't have obligations yet.  Put these years to good use. 

To adults... I challenge you to raise the bar a little bit.  I think the bar of expectation that we as a society have of teenagers is on the floor.... it needs to be raised to the ceiling so that teenagers can rise to the challenge.  It's not hard for them to sit on the floor.   Help them expand their world and fly higher and farther than you ever thought possible!

The best investment out there

YES, there really is such a thing as a good investment these days! It's a risk... you can't play it safe, but the value of the investment will never decrease.  Read on...

As I was filing taxes this year, I got to the part about IRA contributions during last year.  I dug through the massively large stack of tax related papers and finally found the one IRA paper.  Surely they have this wrong I thought.  I know I invested more than that.  Oh wait........ yeah..... I forgot to start investing again when I got another job.  Oops.  I was slightly disappointed in that I didn't put in as much as I expected.... but this got me thinking.  Would I be disappointed in my 2008 statement from God?  Have I invested as much as I should have spiritually?  And are my investments bringing dividends?  Should I be investing my time and talent in other "funds" that have better returns than the ones they are invested in now? 

Reminds me of the Parable of the Talents:
It's also like a man going off on an extended trip. He called his servants together and delegated responsibilities. To one he gave five thousand dollars, to another two thousand, to a third one thousand, depending on their abilities. Then he left. Right off, the first servant went to work and doubled his master's investment. The second did the same. But the man with the single thousand dug a hole and carefully buried his master's money.
 After a long absence, the master of those three servants came back and settled up with them. The one given five thousand dollars showed him how he had doubled his investment. His master commended him: 'Good work! You did your job well. From now on be my partner.'
 The servant with the two thousand showed how he also had doubled his master's investment. His master commended him: 'Good work! You did your job well. From now on be my partner.'
The servant given one thousand said, 'Master, I know you have high standards and hate careless ways, that you demand the best and make no allowances for error. I was afraid I might disappoint you, so I found a good hiding place and secured your money. Here it is, safe and sound down to the last cent.' The master was furious. 'That's a terrible way to live! It's criminal to live cautiously like that! If you knew I was after the best, why did you do less than the least? The least you could have done would have been to invest the sum with the bankers, where at least I would have gotten a little interest.

So, the best investment is to open an account with God. If you've already got your account, be sure to use the account He has given you filled with goodness, grace and mercy.  By using the "spiritual currency" in this account, you will  invest back into it too.    Just think about the dividends of helping one person (who helps one person) every day for the next 31 days... over ONE BILLION PEOPLE would be effected by the end of the month... 1,073,741,824 to be exact.   That's a pretty amazing number to reap the dividends of!

I don't normally make New Year's Resolutions, but I do make budgets.  This year I will budget my TIME so that I am not disappointed in my year-end statement with the First and The Last Bank & Trust of God!

Silence is Golden... or is it?

Growing up, I always understood that silence was a good thing.  My mom always wanted a little piece of it for some reason!  And I always enjoyed it myself.  It helped me to get in tune with myself.  And I still enjoy it.  It helps me get in tune with God.

But lately, I've realized that silence isn't always good.  Sometimes you need to speak up loud and clear.  There was yet another gang-related shooting in our neighborhood and the neighbors refuse to speak up and say who did it.  They are afraid they are being snitches.  Afraid that they'll be the next target.  To the first excuse, I say... COPOUT.  Who cares what other people thingk.  The second excuse has some validation since there is a history of the "snitches" being targeted.  But if everyone is silent and just lets this slide by without the offenders getting consequences, guess what?  They are going to do it again.  And who is to say that your family won't be involved out of chance. 

And with Martin Luther King Day just passing, I couldn't help but think of just how many people were silent when it came to the poor treatment of African Americans. What if people had spoke up sooner? 

And just today I was on Facebook and saw a group that made me sick to my stomach. A group making fun of a high school boy.  The wall was filled with hate messages.  So you know what?  I spoke up.  I don't know what difference it makes, but I refuse to have knowledge of a group like that and not do something about it!

Silence isn't always golden... sometimes you have to speak up. 

And in honor of Martin Luther King Jr. and his willingness to speak up, one of my favorite quotes from him...

We will have to repent in this generation not merely for the vitriolic words and actions of the bad people, but for the appalling silence of the good people.

WRASSLIN... with the Biggun

Okay, I have a confession to make.   If it wasn't obvious from my title, Southern-isms have started rubbing off on me. Every once in awhile, my dear husband will smile and look at me with this sparkle in his eye and say "Say that again"  and I know I've done it.  I've countrified a word. 

Anyway, tonight I was so happy to make a trip longer than my normal 1/4mile commute to work so I could listen to some new praise and worship music and just spend time with God.  As I made my drive out into the country and just started listening, this is what I heard...

God (the Biggun): "Kacey... dear Kacey... you like to wrestle don't you?"

Me: "What?  God, you know I don't have an ounce of athleticism.  And I sure don't like WWE.  But if you want me to go into wrestling... I guess I could figure it out"

God: "No, no dear child... I mean, you like to figuratively wrestle.  With ME"

Me: "WHAT?  No, no, you've got the wrong girl. I'm so easy going.  Whatever you say, I'm your go to girl Remember?  Right?  Come on.... REALLY?"
............
.........

 "Ummm, God?  Did you hear me? DID YOU HEAR WHAT I'M SAYING?!"

Needless to say, I've come to realize that I sure am wrestling with God. And I'm not talking thumb wrestling... or arm wrestling.  I'm talking full blown "rolling-around-on-the-floor-getting-cauliflower-ear" WRESTLING with God.   I've been like a two year old who wants a piece of candy when she is being offered the whole candy factory.  I don't always see the big picture.  I like to see what I want to see.  Don't we all?

I guess I've always been a proponent of letting God know how I feel... I think sometimes He is the only one who can handle my feelings.  But recently, I think I've been telling Him how HE should feel.  I've let MY dreams take precedence when I really know that HIS dreams are so much more amazing that anything I could ever imagine.

I don't want to be like Jacob and walk around with a limp the rest of my life for wrestling with God and getting my way.  God makes a much better partner than an opponent. So I'm going to get up off the mat and walk hand in hand with God in the direction He wants me to go in.

Memories

Whew, what a crazy month it has been! 

So we just got down with one of our longest and yet busiest holiday seasons. Oh, and did I mention, the first as a merried er,  married couple? I must have written Merry Christmas on too many Christmas cards! :)

My birthday in December adds one more crazy celebration to the December Dash.  And this year, I had a two day celebration!  On Friday Russ took me out to eat Japanese (MY FAVORITE!) and to Target and Kohls (two more favorites!)  Then on Saturday, he took me to see A Christmas Carol in Charleston for my birthday and we had a LOVELY time.   It was a good way to get into the Christmas spirit too since  it had been so warm down here.  It is hard to get into the Christmas decorating mood when it is 65 degrees.  Although, I'm ready for that weather to come back!

We started out our Christmas Break with a trip to the Biltmore with some friends. Mother Nature decided that we should see the Biltmore in the snow. When we finally got there (thanks to Jon's cautious driving skills), it was beautiful. 

But it was also VERY cold.  We were a little disappointed to find out that some parts of the estate were closed because of the snow, but we were happy we got to see it all decorated for Christmas.  At least the girls were!  The guys were just happy to be guys and rough house in the snow.

(I love you too honey)

After our trip to Asheville, we headed to Russ' parents where we spent a few days just relaxing and a few nights (okay, quite a few nights) playing Monopoly and other silly games. I so love board games. And spending time with family. So it was pretty much amazing :)

Then we headed North to the mountains of Merlin. Where it was very cold. Very snowy. But pretty. Then it snowed some more. And kept us in the house for an extra day. Which I believe caused certain crazy people to do crazy things....

What a goof.  Anyway, spending a few days on the farm always puts me in a reflective state of mind. 

This is a picture of the barn where we spent many a summer play in the hay pile, watching the dirty pigs root around in... well, dirt, and tried to coax the cows to come into the barn so we could see them up close.  Those were the days... really.  We worked our tails off in the hay field, but it was fun to us.  Probably because we didn't have to fix the baler when it broke every other bale,  we didn't have other things to do, we didn't have to stack the hay in the specific hay stacking pattern, and we didn't have to clean up when the load fell off the wagon.  We could just run home where Meme would greet us with a smile, a kiss and a glass of water, or coke... or any other thing we had talked her into buying at the grocery store.  The we'd usually run back up to the field with a big jug of water for the hard working men and wait until they turned that big escalator on that would carry the hay WAY up, then drop it down.  I could watch it for hours.  But then the men would get hungry and we'd go home and clean up and eat a big warm slice of homemade bread and tomatoes fresh from the garden..... mmm, my mouth is watering now.  Anyway, the barn didn't always look this disheveled.  It started going downhill when Grandad did.  But it is still standing as a reminder of all the hardwork he put into the farm and all the hardwork we did for him.  Even beneath the snow, I can still see the path that he used to take and him carrying his pail of water for the animals or slop for the pigs.  I sure do miss that man... and the barn misses him too! 

Anyway, when the skies cleared up, we headed down out of the mountains where.... we were greeted by MORE snow believe it or not.  We spent a few days with some more crazy members of my family and friends, watched some football and just relaxed.  And then we made the grueling drive back to the South.  We were hoping for some warmer weather, but it has been nice and chilly here.  I got a promise from the weather man to be back in the 50's next week so he better not let me down.  My toes and fingers are ready for warmth and feeling again!

We had a great first Christmas together as husband and wife... probably one of the best I've had.  It is amazing that the best Christmas' that I can remember weren't about the gifts.  Russ and I didn't have much money this year for each other, especially with all the traveling that we did, but we simply enjoyed each other and being able to give to our friends and families.  That's what it's all about.

Anyway, Happy 2010!  I hope this year brings many more exciting things our way... and your way too!